Acknowledge and Accept Fatherhood Fears

One of the greatest joys of any father is to eagerly await the impending birth of a baby. You are about to become the dad of a child who will mean the world to you but along with the ecstatic feeling, there will be fatherhood fears which could either lay dormant during the nine months of pregnancy or hit you with a full-force that you are unable to understand or comprehend. Suddenly your status as just a couple changes and you are also a parent now. There are a number of fears stirring up quite a storm in you. You do not know how to address these fears and are apprehensive about discussing it with anyone. You think that your fatherhood fears are unique to you and no one else in the world felt this way. Discussing your fatherhood fears with your partner is also ruled out as you don’t want her to misunderstand you. Having such fears is quite normal and it helps you in a way to overcome the pressure and anxieties of fatherhood. 

The first fear that takes root in your mind is the financial fear and this is considered the most common fatherhood fears. The financial expenditure of a family increases manifold with the arrival of a child. In most cases, the father becomes the sole breadwinner of the family and this adds to the financial woes. Your budget and financial plans have to be revamped. Fear of death or mortality is one more big fatherhood fears associated with becoming a parent. You cannot take life for granted as you are suddenly more responsible for the future of your family. The family depends on you and you cannot take unnecessary risks with life like you used to do earlier. 

Fatherhood brings forth a strange predicament for fathers who are suddenly apprehensive of the fact that their partner, lover, and wife of many years for whom you were the center of existence has someone more demanding to attend to. Most couples tend to drift apart during this period. The bond the mother shares with the baby cannot be matched by any relationship. For a mother, nothing matters more than a child and every small wish of the child is given first preference. Your demands and wishes are most likely to be pushed to the background. The child gets preference in all aspects of life whether it is making breakfast or shopping. The sexual relationship of a couple is seriously hit during this point of time and lovemaking takes a lot of effort and spontaneity which was your high point suffers. Bringing up a child is a joint responsibility of the couple and the couple that bonds and overcomes the fears is the couple that will stay happy together for eternity. 

The wife has to in a way understand fatherhood fears and try and acknowledge and accept it. The babies also have the need of the mother more than the father during the initial two years and no matter what kind of sacrifices you end up doing they will dote on their mothers. You will start playing a major role after two years and your real test of fatherhood begins then. At some point in time during the marriage you will also get commitment fears along with fatherhood fears and you would have also visualized running away. But with the baby which is a life long responsibility you can take no such decisions. With time all your fatherhood fears vanish and you cherish every moment of your existence.